Celina Week# 13: Looking Outside of an Oval-Shaped Window
I felt almost cartoonish during that flight, and I like to imagine the plane looked like this.
It was a week until Christmas Day. The house was decorated in brilliant colors of red and green, and I felt a surge of that commercial of Christmas cheer when looking down the lit up streets. I was taking a nap on the couch, my last week of school before winter break giving me an opportunity to leisure—that and I was eleven. I remember waking up to the sound of my parents' distress, and them going upstairs to tell my sister, who was a senior in high school at the time, the news. "The visa renewal got denied," I heard my dad talking in a state of pondering.
I looked at him perplexed, but felt the sadness creep into my very veins as he explained what it meant: we had to move out of the country in the next week or two. In my wildest dreams, I never thought something like it was possible. It sounded too cruel that all normality could be taken away from somebody so quickly and for no reason. We were good residents, we were law-abiding, but yet still achingly unwanted in the land known for liberty and dreams. My parents' dreams for my sister and I were crushed, my sister's dreams for college, and those of mine that I did not know of yet.
That was the first time I saw my dad cry.
It did not feel quite real until we reached the airport, all our suitcases packed. As we flew over the bay, I could not help but think of all the little lives of every single person. All around me people went about their day as usual, on the way to the grocery store, to pick up their kids from school, to have dinner with their family. I wondered if they were grateful to get to enjoy the land of dreams longer than I had. I acknowledged a new kind of reality for the first time. That privilege was too often forgotten, laughter too often taken for granted, and a lack of hardship I had enjoyed that bred ignorance. I learnt a cool new word called empathy. I felt like that word helped me fit better into the world than I had before. Astounding that it took that seven-letter -empathy- word to remind me that the world was considerably bigger than myself.
Hi Celina! I found your blog so emotionally captivating, it truly paints a picture of what you were experiencing at the time. The emotional diction you used to describe this moment of your life inflicted a very strong feeling I'm sure your entire audience felt while reading. I can't say I relate, but I understand in the sense that I've had friends that have gone through this very situation (their visa not getting renewed or expiring without them knowing), leading to them having to be gone and out of the country by the end of the month. It's a very sad and tragic act done by a system that gives little-to-no care for the people it claims to protect. Hopefully in the future, this will change, and family's won't have to experience things like this again.
ReplyDeleteHey Celina, your blog post was really emotional, and I was completely caught off guard. I am so shocked that the government just refused to renew the visa like that, and I can only imagine what it must have been like for your sister to have to leave the country just after college applications were submitted. This, coupled with your complex message at the end about empathy, left a lasting impression on me (and likely many others). Emphasizing the importance of using empathy at a time like this, when your life is getting completely shaken up, is a testament to your maturity that others live to be like.
ReplyDeleteHi Celina, your blog is very revealing on the issues many Americans are facing right now and I hope your family is doing well. People have a lot of worries in their lives, and I can’t imagine having the uncertainty of your family’s location being a worry, it’s truly something that is extremely mentally taxing and sickening to think that this is an issue in our country. Everybody should be given the opportunity to take advantage of the opportunities in our country and achieve what they deserve, and forcefully removing people from those dreams is truly discouraging.
ReplyDeleteYour blog was very personal, and very emotionally captivating. The description of how you felt only enhanced it. Thank you for sharing this experience with us all and I respect your bravery in sharing this with us.
Hello Celina, Your blog moved my heart with the ways you wrote it. It has a certain rhythm to and I found myself slowly drawn to the end without even noticing. You portrayed the confusion a child feels when their family is in distress perfectly. As a child who also moved away from home at a long age I definitely resonate with your frustration and jealousy. Your last line about learning empathy real struck me. I completely agree with your stance that possessing empathy makes the world feel much greater. I really enjoyed reading your blog and hope to read from you more soon!!
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